"Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation." -Graham Greene [Thanks to Jill]
This is how I survive. I write it out. When life hands me moments in which I cannot focus on my own life. Moments which make me re-think the basis of everything I know to be true. Moments that make me so nervous that I have to detach myself from the conversation in order to survive it. Moments that are everything and nothing that I want them to be at the same time. I can't deal with them any other way. I've tried. I go for long pointless drives and just walk around on the railroad tracks. I talk for hours about every detail with my sister. I sleep and sleep and sleep some more, trying to give my dreams the opportunity to deal with it for me. But nothing works. Nothing processes my life like writing about it does. Nothing releases it the same way, so that I can come back to it and hear myself out.
I am finding it more and more essential to being who I am... this writing it all out thing.